24 January 2007


Weeks, nay, months of work came down to just two measly hours, two measly questions, and two measly essays in a freezing cold hall.

Can now ceremoniously burn all notes for English. Hurrah! Ritual burnings of educational material! A pyre of improving works, brought to mere ashes!
Except I can't, as may have re-sits. No burning satisfaction therefore.

No matter however, as some lasting impression was gleaned in the form of a few jolly quotes, immortalised in my mind from repetition and frequent use, forever branded on my brain. These are my favourite...

His urine is congealed ice - summons the pleasantest of images

The rebellion of a codpiece - always amusing

Man, proud man, dressed in little brief authority - sounds impressive, and a little epic

Groping for trouts in a peculiar river - another comical innuendo

Some rise by sin, and some by virtue fall - my favourite epic quote, almost Lord of the Rings in tone I think

Th'impression of keen whips I'd wear as rubies and strip myself to death as to a bed - that Isabella is a kinky one; it's always the quiet ones

By God, I was a lusty one! - she says it like it is, that Wife of Bath

By very force he raft her maidenhead - who knew rape could sound so poetic?

I could not withdraw my chamber of Venus from a good fellow - pick up on a running theme?

As a bittern bumbleth in the mire - I just like how this sounds. God knows what it means.

So, you see, something was learnt. Even if it is that the majority of all English literature is sex-obsessed. So that's why so many boys take it in the sixth form.

1 comment:

Menapausal mad woman said...

Imagine the uses to which you can put those marvelous quotes......